Original: Campo Liberado Bloqueado Transcription ↓real story; string sender; sender = "Danilo J B"; Boss: The users are typing wrong info in that text box. We have to automate and lock it Programmer: Okay...(…) leia mais

Transcription ↓real story; string sender; sender = "Fabrício Olmo Aride"; Boss (on the phone): Hi, it's the boss. I will get in late, so I jotted down what I want you to do in the meantime... Programmer: Yeah, go ahead ... <silence> Boss: Look, I'll call you back in a bit...(…) leia mais

Transcription ↓real story; string sender; sender = "Thiago"; Programmer: Boss, can I get a user to do some testing for us? Boss: Yes, but first we need to make sure that the system is working 100%. Programmer: IF THE SYSTEM WAS WORKING 100%, THEN WHY WOULD I NEED TESTING??(…) leia mais

Transcription ↓real story; string sender; sender = "Marcelo"; Programmer: Hey Boss, so I won a free Java course taught by one of the best Java guys around at an event I attended. But the course is a week long, all day. Can I have this week off? Boss: No way! We don't use Java in nothing in this company...(…) leia mais

Original: Esses clientes... Transcription ↓Boss: What a ?????! Our client is cracking the activation key of our software, to avoid to pay the monthly US$30... Programmer: Hmm... Your system was made in delphi, right? And how much did you pay on Delphi? Boss: Nothing... I'ts cracked Programmer: hmmm...(…) leia mais

Original: Separando os logs Transcription ↓/* True story sent by leandro pincini */ Boss: I want you split the log files by module to ease the reading under runtime Programmer: ok Boss: Have you finished? Programmer: Yes. Logs separated (Later...) Boss: It's very hard to read the logs the way you've done.(…) leia mais

Original: Modificações rápidas Transcription ↓/* true story sent by Fábio Gomide Nolasco */ Boss: Great job on this website. Those were well invested 90 days. Programmer: Well... I'm not a designer... So, I presented every step to you to assure it was done right Boss: It's just a matter of style...(…) leia mais

Original: Contratação Transcription ↓Boss: Since Jack took that flight to sidney and we have no news about him, we decided to hire someone else Programmer: Please, tell this time you will hire someone with experience... Boss: Sure! He has a lot of experience with computers. My nephew, Justin.(…) leia mais

Original: Nomes dos métodos Transcription ↓/* True story sent by Gabriel Fonseca */ Boss: The names of your methods aren't obvious... Programmer: What do you mean? Boss: The point is that I never know which verb was used Programmer: exclude() isn't obvious? Boss: 'Exclude' is the worst!(…) leia mais

Transcription ↓/* True story sent by Erisvaldo Carvalho */Manager: What code is it that you're trying to fix?Programmer: SQL...Manager: Hmmm... Let me see it...Manager: I wonder that the error is there on these -- (minus minus), because "minus minus" equals "plus"... It's a calculus failOriginal: Erro de SQL