real story;
string sender = "jFRAF";
A.P.: Man, look this: the are some data on our database dated by 2050...
Dev: Wow... I think I know why...
A.P.: Timestamp conversion error?
Dev: No, it can only mean that in 2050 we will be testing a time travel module and those are the test results...
A.P.: Well, so it's better to leave a note asking for forgiveness for still been using these same bad structures 30 years from now!
--
T-shirt: import * from future

real story;
string sender = "Andre Vicente Neves";
Boss: Dev, did you delivered the new version to the qa team to test it?
Dev: Yes, but because of the ios 16 update, the app is crashing right on the start and I'm fixing it now
Boss: Ok, so ask the QA to test only the parts which doesn't crash...
Dev: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: Q.A.: Quite absurd!

real story;
string sender = "Davi Lima";
User (by phone): Hi, there's an issue about your system, I've just opened a ticket about it, could you resolve it for me?
Dev: Wait, let me see it...
(Dev sees the ticket's title: Computer freezing)
Dev: Put back the gloves, Elsa!
User: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: Let it go!

real story;
string sender = "Geraldi";
Dev: Hey, Guys! I'll deploy a new version, anyone still want to commit something?
A.P.: No, already did it
Alonso: I would, but it's still missing something
Dev: What is it?
Alonso: It just has to work
Dev and A.P.: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: Don't works. But delivered in 20% of time

real story;
string sender = "Jorge Bubba";
Dev: Alonso, I need you to correct the API return. In addition to the error code, put a boolean to confirm whether the compensation is done or not...
Alonso: okay!
(Some time later...)
Dev: So, did you finish?
Alonso: Yes, it's done! I even created a double confirmation!
Dev: Double confirmation? What's this?
Code: {
isSuccess: true,
isFailure: false
}
Dev: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: !false or !!true


string sender = "xvs950";
Boss: From now on we will adopt a hybrid work model. Part of the week you will do remote work and part in the office...
A.P.: Cool!
Dev Man: Nice!
Dev Woman: How many days we will do home office?
Boss: 2 days! You'll be free to work anywhere in the world 2 days every week...
Boss: On the other 5 you will work here in the office!
All Dev: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: got excited too early

real story;
string sender = "luuhknot";
Dev: Jimmy, I'll create another branch to develop this new feature...
Jimmy: Don't need it, just use the "dev" branch
Dev: But it's something new... I don't want to mix with the other changes there
Jimmy: Oh, wait a minute...
Jimmy: Ready! I just merged everything there to production, now the branch is free to use...
Dev: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: git ignore

real story;
string sender = "Eduardo Luiz";
Dev: Alonso, check the source code, it is crashing on line 23...
Alonso: Ok, I'll see it...
Code: data = self._get_data()
Alonso: Oh, I got it! I already learned how to fix this kind of errors. I'll do it now!
Dev: Great!
Alonso: It's ready! Check it out...
Code:
23 try:
24 data = self._get_data()
25 except:
26 pass
Dev: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: Bug fixed!

real story;
string sender = "Gilmar Lopes";
User (on phone): Good morning, I'm having an issue with your system. I can't read the barcode using the collector
Dev: Weird... It works on my machine!
Dev: Could you, please, read the barcode for me? So I can test it here...
User: Ok...
User: Thin bar, thick bar, two thin bars, then another thick one...
Dev: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: Thank God that was not a qr code

real story;
string sender = "Guilherme";
Dev: So, Alonso, we have to develop the updates from our local system. Please, make a new branch on git, while I finish some features on the other project...
Alonso: Alright!
(More than 3 hours later...)
Dev: Wow, dude... I almost forgot... Did you create that new branch?
Alonso: It got a little abstract to me... So, I was going to ask... What is a branch?
Dev: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: Venha provar meu branch (untranslated because it's a brazilian music)