real story;
string sender = "Danielle Arruda";
(about 10 years ago...)
Dev (a woman presenting the system): So, in this version we implemented biometrics, where each employee will be identified by their fingerprint...
Dev: This will make access easier for everyone...
User: Interesting... But...
User: Couldn’t we also use DNA?
(Dev spits out their coffee)
(Note at the end: In a few years, this comic won’t even be funny anymore...)
--
T-shirt: Damn you, Hollywood!

real story;
string sender = "Helton";
A.P.: Wait, man... Are you creating the icons for the report? Why don’t you just ask the designer?
Dev: Yeah, so...
(The Developer starts remembering past situations)
Dev: I need the missing icons for the report in SVG, with a blue border...
Designer: Got it!
Dev: Dude, they came with black borders, I needed blue ones.
Designer: Oh, no problem.
Dev: Okay, the border is right now, but it came as a PNG — I need it in SVG for the system.
Designer: Alright...
Dev: Why did I get a JPG with green borders this time??
(Back to the present moment)
Dev: It’s because I’m a very creative and versatile professional!
--
T-shirt: The error is always human (or dev)

real story;
string sender = "João Bueno";
Dev: Dude, you know CSS isn’t really my thing, right? I needed to create a parallax effect, so I asked both ChatGPT and Gemini for help. They both told me to use the :in-viewport pseudo-class.
A.P.: :in-viewport? I’ve never heard of that one...
Dev: Yeah, so it didn’t work, and I went looking through the documentation. Found nothing about it. It's not on the W3Schools list, nor on MDN...
A.P.: That’s wild...
Dev: So I went back to the AI and asked: "Does :in-viewport actually exist?" And it answered: "No. It doesn’t exist and isn’t implemented by any browser. It was just a proposed feature that never got accepted. "
A.P.: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: Bad vibes

A.P.: Dude, did you see that Meta won't include the fact-checking feature for Facebook, Instagram, and so on anymore?
Dev: Weird... I thought everything on Instagram was already fake...
(Alonso on the drums): BA-DUM TSSS!!!
--
T-shirt: Did you believe in those perfect lives?

string sender = "Filipizaum";
A.P.: Hmm... I think the error is on the client side...
Dev: Nope! I'm sure the error is on the server side!
A.P.: You haven't even looked into this issue. How can you be so sure the error is on the server side and not the client side?
Dev: Because the client is always right!
A.P.: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: I just can't help it!

real story;
string sender = "Ricardo";
User (on the phone): Hi, I’m not able to make the entries for one of the trucks here.
Dev: Hold on, let me check... Oh, the registration is incomplete...
User: What do you mean?
Dev: It’s missing the tires... You need to add the tires, otherwise, the system won’t proceed...
(Some time later...)
User: Look, it’s still showing an error... It was a lot of work, but the guy managed to replace all four truck tires... Even so, the system won’t move forward...
Dev: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: I also don’t know why the system requires the tires

real story;
string sender = "tardelli";
(A good few years ago...)
Developer: So, we can use jQuery for the layout...
Project Manager: Oh, great idea!
Project Manager (turning to the boss): jQuery is a tool Java uses to write queries...
Project Manager (turning to the development team): But how could this impact the layout development?
Developer, Developer (female), and Assistant: PLOP!
--
Developer (man) T-shirt: You're really nailing it
Developer (woman) T-shirt: Don't confuse jQuery with Jim Carrey

real story;
string sender = "Diego";
Boss: Dev, I noticed you took the whole day to complete this PR (Pull Request). Why did it take so long?
Dev: I first had to figure out how the integration APIs worked in order to develop...
Boss: Okay, but this PR only has 5 classes, not even 80 lines of code!
Dev: Look, it was a job of analysis, modeling, and coding! If you want a typist's job, I can write code the same way lawyers fill pages with unnecessary text just to make a point...
(Boss frowns)
--
T-shirt: You have no idea how many lines I wrote and deleted before arriving at the solution

real story;
string sender = "Proactive Programmer";
Boss: Dev, congratulations! Thanks to your initiative in caching the bank account queries, we have extra money in the budget this year!
Dev: Wow, thank you!
Boss: We might even be able to buy a new access control system
(6 months later...)
Boss: Dev, according to the data from the system, you’ve never entered before 10:30...
Dev: Oh, that’s because I...
Boss: Because of this, we’re going to have to let you go...
Dev: PLOP!
--
T-shirt: This robot is happy to serve you